I get so frustrated on Valentines Day. Women tell each other how they are supposed to Love and it makes me mad. So many contradictory opinions from your friends, magazines + books + articles + movies + poetry, retail stores, and your parents, and social media. It's exhausting to try and process. And the thing that gets me the most is this message of empowerment we all preach, but underneath it all is direction on how to do that. We need to just let each other be. To feel and express Love, however we all damn well please.
I'm being told that love prompted is cliche - if I get pretty flowers and chocolates and I post my love on the internet, but I keep seeing pictures and stories of love everywhere I turn and I hate that I question whether or not it's all just for show; and I feel bad about that because I should be able to be proud of the person I am with and show them off and be happy about what they do for me (if I want).
We should be allowed to share our happiness with our world without being scrutinized or judged for it.
Me showing you my life does not give you permission to insert yourself into it.
So in the midst of not knowing how to present myself without the world being intrusive, I've been feeling like I'd rather just keep to myself.
I got comfortable with my decision because when I would pick my head up from my phone and look around at the life I have in front of me [the life we've made together] I'm just as happy as those people look who posted pictures kissing or bouquets of roses.
Becuase I will smile at him regardless if there are flowers on the table [But will always be thankful for an extra touch of beauty in our lives]
What I'm really getting at here is: The gesture. Please don't devalue the gesture because of the connotation you have for Valentines. There is Love, thoughtfulness, in the gesture - no matter what day it is made.
Valentines Day is commercialized. You got me (but let's be honest - everything today is commercialized) and a Holiday for no particular reason except to celebrate Love! - I honestly think is the best holiday we have. What better reason to celebrate do we have? The most prized, sought after, noun, verb, feeling/emotion, connection in the world. Love. Yes. Let's celebrate it however you see fit. Send your friends texts and give your Mom a hug and write your boyfriend a card and let him buy you flowers - because they are beautiful and so are you and he Loves you! And if nothing else, do something nice for yourself today because all Love is valid, especially the love you show to yourself.
So don't let anyone else's opinion about "the right way" and the best time to show Love stand in the way of your celebration/appreciation/gratitude/delight. Let go of the idea that your partner should buy you flowers or gifts "just because" for no reason - because that's "real love". Love is whatever you want it to be so stop thinking of "real Love" as the opposite of what Valentines Day promotes - and don't measure your Love in gifts either - because presence is the real present.
Look up from your phone and appreciate the love that fills your home.
[Ending my hypocritical rant about the best way to Love.]
Just Love to the fullest extent you can and be thankful for the people who do that in return. That's all I really needed to write.
Goodnight Sending Lots of Love
[by the way - my Mom thought LOL meant Lots Of Love until today. I should have never corrected her]